Pony of Mine
(to the tune of 'American Pie')
A long, long time ago
I can still remember when the ponies used to be in stores
And I knew if I helped my dad
And tried my best not to be bad
Then maybe on my birthday I'd get more
But then the '90s made me sappy
Full of hormones and unhappy
My adolescence dawning
Pretended they were boring
I can't remember if I cried
When finally I realised
But something touched me deep inside
The day the ponies died.
(Refrain)
So bye bye, little pony of mine
Drove my pickup to the toyshop but the toyshop was dry
And the Mountain Boys were drinking whiskey and rye
Singin' this'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
Do you work for Hasbro toys?
And do you make things for girls and boys?
If the bossman says you must?
Do you believe in Santa Claus?
Or do you think kids are brattish bores,
And can you make the magic turn to dust?
Well, I know you took them out of shops
Production at the factory stopped
The ponies were withdrawn
Not another little pony was born
I was a lonely teenage indie chick
With a bunch of records and a black lipstick
But I knew I was kinda sick
The day the ponies died.
I started singin'
(Refrain)
Now for ten years we've been on our own
And we're all nearly fully grown
But that's not how it used to be.
When the ponies played in a valley of dreams
With their playsets and accessories
And stories that came from you and me
Oh, and Majesty was looking down
When Hasbro stole her pony crown
The story was adjourned
No verdict was returned
And while Nirvana sat atop the charts
Some kids played ponies in the park
But we sang dirges in the dark
The day the ponies died.
We were singin'
(Refrain)
Helter skelter in a summer swelter
Our youth flew by, we were all off kilter
Falling fast from eight miles high
My mind was filled with friends and boys
No room left for my pony toys
'Til a pony in a junkshop caught my eye
Now being grown-up seemed so pretend
So I went in search of my childhood friends
But the empty shelves before me
Had been filled up with Barbie.
The new ponies tried to take their place
But they're kinda hard, and thin of face
To some they're a complete disgrace
To all the ponies who died.
We started singin'
(Refrain)
Oh, and there we were all in one place
A generation lost in space
Yet still there's time to start again
So come on, tell us who you miss the most
At the My Little Pony Trading Post
And there you'll find many online friends
And now we search across the land
Sometimes we win, sometimes we're scammed
Although they're secondhand
We'll find them, or be damned!
And as the hunt expands to overseas
Some pony fans pray on their knees
Still hoping for a rerelease
The day the ponies died.
We were singin'
(Refrain)
I met a girl who sang the blues
And I asked her for some happy news
But she just smiled and said, "Ebay".
I went down to the online store
And I saw the ponies from years before
But meanwhile I'd forgotten how to play.
And in the streets the children screamed
Collectors cried, and the ponies dreamed
But not a word was spoken
The magic spell was broken
And the three ponies I still love today,
Buttons, Twilight, Milky Way
They caught the boat to Mandalay
The day the ponies died.
And they were singin'
(Refrain)
They were singin'
Bye bye, little pony of mine
Drove my pickup to the toyshop but the toyshop was dry
And the Mountain Boys were drinking whiskey and rye
Singin' this'll be the day that I die.
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